Beth's Family Tree
by TheatreGleek
Summary: Beth's first grade teacher gets understandably confused by Beth's twisted family tree. Inspired by today's spoiler for 3x04.


**Title:** Beth's Family Tree

**Characters:** Beth Puckerman-Corcoran, OC, implied Puck/Shelby and Rachel/Quinn

**Spoilers:** Inspired by today's spoiler for 3x04

**Rating:** K

**Word Count:** 952

**Description:** Based on today's spoiler for 3x04 and a subsequent conversation with my dear friend epiphanysellars.

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><p>Mrs. Caroline Walters had been a teacher for over twenty years, and she liked to think that she had seen it all. Overzealous parents, precocious children, injuries she would rather forget and her fair share of troublesome children. But the day Beth Puckerman-Corcoran entered her first grade classroom was an experience quite unlike any other.<p>

It was the first week of school, and Mrs. Walter was still getting to know her newest cohort of children. She had briefly met some of the parents on the first day, but was still learning to match up the children to the parents.

"Today children, we're going to be drawing our family trees," Mrs. Walters said excitedly to the group of six year olds seated in front of her.

"What's a family tree?" a small dark haired boy asked quietly.

"It's like a drawing of your family," Mrs. Walters explained. "To show who all the people in your family are." Mrs. Walters picked up her chalk and turned to the board to demonstrate. She drew a square and drew a female stick figure in it; "This box is me." She drew a line from the top of the box, connecting it to a horizontal one and drawing a square at either end. "This box is my mum, and this one's my dad." Returning to the original square, she drew a horizontal line, connecting it to a new box. "And this one is my brother." The group of small children in front of her began to nod in understanding. "Okay everyone, now you have a go with your own family trees, and I'll come and help you if you're having trouble."

Mrs. Walters made her way around the classroom, answering questions for her young class. She glanced over at a desk on the left side of the room, and noticed Beth Puckerman-Corcoran looking very confused.

"Hi Beth, how are you going?" Mrs. Walters said kindly. In the few days of school, she had learnt that Beth was a wonderful child. She had started school as the best reader in her class by far, and was always in a cheerful mood. Beth had also become one of the most talkative members of her class very quickly.

"Mrs. Walters, I'm confused with my family tree," Beth said, frowning at her page with an adorable pout. The centre of her page had a few boxes with lines going through them every which way. "It makes sense in my head but I can't draw it right."

"Okay Beth, how about you tell me and I can draw it for you?" Mrs. Walters said supportively.

"Okay," she nodded. "Well there's me… and Mummy and Rachel?"

"Who's Rachel?" Mrs. Walters asked, not wanting to get anything wrong.

"Rachel's my big sister," she said with a grin. "Though she's a lot bigger than me. Mummy had her a long time ago. But she's not really my sister, because Mummy's not _really_ my mummy and Rachel has two daddies. Her daddies buy me Christmas presents though and they babysit me sometimes when Mummy goes out."

Mrs. Walters added this newest development, a little confused but ignoring it for the time being. "Is that all you can think of right now Beth?"

"No Mrs. Walters, I'm not finished yet!" she said indignantly. "You forgot Quinn and Daddy!"

"Okay Beth, where do they go?" Mrs. Walters said patiently.

"Well, Quinn and Daddy are my real mummy and daddy. And Mummy adopted me when I was born. Rachel explained it to me properly one day; she said that Quinn and Daddy were too young to take care of me so Mummy adopted me so she could take care of me. And Quinn and Daddy's mummies come and visit me all the time."

Mrs. Walters nodded, trying to determine the accepted protocol was for birth parents on a family tree. Nevertheless, she managed.

"And Rachel is Quinn's girlfriend," Beth said offhandedly, and Mrs. Walters did a double take. She liked to think she was an openminded individual, but this revelation caught her off guard. "Rachel and Quinn are going to get married this year. We're going to New York and they're getting married in a theatre on Broadway. I'm going to be their flowergirl. I've already got my dress at home. It's so funny because Quinn and Rachel BOTH dated Daddy at high school and now they're marrying each other."

Mrs. Walters nodded and stared at the sheet ahead of her, trying to figure out how to document this latest piece of information on the already cluttered diagram.

"Oh! We forgot Daddy and Mummy!" Beth exclaimed, and Mrs. Walters became even more confused.

"Beth, we wrote them down already, see?" the teacher pointed out.

"But Mrs. Walters, there has to be a line between them too. Daddy adopted me too because he likes Mummy. He takes her out on dates sometimes and Mummy dresses up all pretty. And then Daddy has sleepovers with Mummy at my house and he makes breakfast for Mummy and me. One time they started kissing in the kitchen and it was yucky and then the pancakes burnt."

Mrs. Walters was dumbfounded. She could understand how Beth's family tree didn't make sense on paper to the six year old. A family like this would inevitably end up on Jerry Springer in the near future. "Okay Beth, I think we've done very well with yours. How about you read your book while I go help some of the other kids?"

"Okay Mrs. Walters," Beth said with a grin, and was instantly immersed in her book.

The family tree exercise had never been that difficult, Mrs. Walters thought to herself. Now she really had seen it all.


End file.
